I am a hopeless romantic.
Tonight, I watched a super sappy, corny romance movie and loved every second of it, even though it was a maybe a B movie (probably more like a C). Now, I know there are some truly romantic men out there, but I also know that women are much more likely to get sucked into the world's view of a perfect relationship--and a perfect marriage.
Little girls imagine the day when they wear a perfect white dress (the most beautiful dress in the world) and get to act like the premier princess in a Disney movie. They spend a year or more planning every detail of the perfect day to marry the prince--the man of her dreams. It's a perfect fairy tale love story...
But--it's only a story. For so many people, cold hard reality hits them in the face after a month, year, or a few years of marriage. They find out the perfect mate is not perfect at all! The perfect mate leaves messes all over the house, never does the dishes, and makes an annoying sound with a mouth when he (or she) is nervous. That perfect mate is always late to everything, doesn't seem to like the same things as when you got married, and suddenly has developed (GASP) new....life....goals.
It leaves a person wondering...WHO did I actually marry? This surely is not the same person that walked down the aisle on that perfect day. This person is driving me crazy! This person has problems that seem like deal-breakers ten years into marriage, and it leaves you wondering if you made the worst mistake of your life just getting married.
Then...the dreaded "D-word" comes out. Let's just (GASP)...get...a...divorce. This isn't working anymore. You're not the person I married, I'm not the person you married. We were too young and too stupid and didn't think it all through.
(NOTE: This is a situation that I am presenting as a model--I am not getting divorced).
You find yourself spending more and more time in separate activities, and then a person comes along who seems more your style...pays more attention to you...really understands you. If you haven't read my story about the modern day tale of the Garden of Eden--go read it now on my blog! This story that started as a fairy tale has turned into one of the Grimm Brothers tales...a nightmare in the making.
You have one, two, three (or more) kids and you're talking about divorce. You're not fully understanding the weight of your decisions and you have no idea about the lifelong effect it may have on your children to see their parents' marriage fall apart. Kids lose their sense of stability and feel they cannot trust love, or relationships anymore...perhaps, they end up with commitment issues. This is not to bring condemnation on those who have been divorced--God's grace is there for you and your kids, He can restore and work all things for good to those who love God and are called according to His purpose (Romans 8:28), but don't be deceived either, divorce brings difficult consequences.
There's a song that says, "What is love, baby don't hurt me, don't hurt me no more..."
Does the world really know what love is? Do they have an understanding of the word "covenant" and not just the feeling of loving someone. Love is a choice. Love is an action and love is a great commitment to another person.
Enjoy your wedding day (if you're not married yet), but know that real love is not a happy fairy tale. Real love takes dedication, gut-wrenching perseverance and a never-give-up attitude. Real love is very difficult to find, and even harder to cultivate in a relationship--and anyone who tells you otherwise...well, this person would be a liar. Watch out and do not be deceived.
When Jesus died on the cross, He made a covenant promise TO YOU. He promised to love you, to care for you, to be with you, for better or worse, in sickness and in health, for richer or poorer...He promised to bring you toward heaven to be with Him, and that no one would snatch you out of His hand. He promised to love you on your best days AND your worst days, when you turned your back on him, and when you lavish Him with praise.
This is the only true love story. It's about a man, fully man and God, that hung over 2000 years ago on a wooden cross being crucified because He loves you so much. He died when you had your back turned toward Him as the enemy of God. He loved you when you did everything against His ways and commands. He loved you when you persecuted Him and His people and declared His truth to be lies, through words and actions. He loved you then and He loves you now. He will never stop loving you.
Maybe it's time to say "I do" to the One who truly loves you. It's a love story that started before you were ever conceived in the womb, and it's a love story that will never end.
Romans 5:8 (NKJV)
But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.
Romans 8:35-39 (NKJV)
Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or peril, or sword? As it is written, 'For your sake we are killed all day long; We are accounted as sheep for the slaughter.' Yet in all these things we are more than conquerors through Him who loved us. For I am persuaded neither death nor life, nor angels nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present nor things to come, nor height nor depth, nor any other created thing, shall be able to separate us from the love of God which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.
John 15:13 (NKJV)
Greater love has no one than this, than to lay down one’s life for his friends.
Tonight, I watched a super sappy, corny romance movie and loved every second of it, even though it was a maybe a B movie (probably more like a C). Now, I know there are some truly romantic men out there, but I also know that women are much more likely to get sucked into the world's view of a perfect relationship--and a perfect marriage.
Little girls imagine the day when they wear a perfect white dress (the most beautiful dress in the world) and get to act like the premier princess in a Disney movie. They spend a year or more planning every detail of the perfect day to marry the prince--the man of her dreams. It's a perfect fairy tale love story...
But--it's only a story. For so many people, cold hard reality hits them in the face after a month, year, or a few years of marriage. They find out the perfect mate is not perfect at all! The perfect mate leaves messes all over the house, never does the dishes, and makes an annoying sound with a mouth when he (or she) is nervous. That perfect mate is always late to everything, doesn't seem to like the same things as when you got married, and suddenly has developed (GASP) new....life....goals.
It leaves a person wondering...WHO did I actually marry? This surely is not the same person that walked down the aisle on that perfect day. This person is driving me crazy! This person has problems that seem like deal-breakers ten years into marriage, and it leaves you wondering if you made the worst mistake of your life just getting married.
Then...the dreaded "D-word" comes out. Let's just (GASP)...get...a...divorce. This isn't working anymore. You're not the person I married, I'm not the person you married. We were too young and too stupid and didn't think it all through.
(NOTE: This is a situation that I am presenting as a model--I am not getting divorced).
You find yourself spending more and more time in separate activities, and then a person comes along who seems more your style...pays more attention to you...really understands you. If you haven't read my story about the modern day tale of the Garden of Eden--go read it now on my blog! This story that started as a fairy tale has turned into one of the Grimm Brothers tales...a nightmare in the making.
You have one, two, three (or more) kids and you're talking about divorce. You're not fully understanding the weight of your decisions and you have no idea about the lifelong effect it may have on your children to see their parents' marriage fall apart. Kids lose their sense of stability and feel they cannot trust love, or relationships anymore...perhaps, they end up with commitment issues. This is not to bring condemnation on those who have been divorced--God's grace is there for you and your kids, He can restore and work all things for good to those who love God and are called according to His purpose (Romans 8:28), but don't be deceived either, divorce brings difficult consequences.
There's a song that says, "What is love, baby don't hurt me, don't hurt me no more..."
Does the world really know what love is? Do they have an understanding of the word "covenant" and not just the feeling of loving someone. Love is a choice. Love is an action and love is a great commitment to another person.
Enjoy your wedding day (if you're not married yet), but know that real love is not a happy fairy tale. Real love takes dedication, gut-wrenching perseverance and a never-give-up attitude. Real love is very difficult to find, and even harder to cultivate in a relationship--and anyone who tells you otherwise...well, this person would be a liar. Watch out and do not be deceived.
When Jesus died on the cross, He made a covenant promise TO YOU. He promised to love you, to care for you, to be with you, for better or worse, in sickness and in health, for richer or poorer...He promised to bring you toward heaven to be with Him, and that no one would snatch you out of His hand. He promised to love you on your best days AND your worst days, when you turned your back on him, and when you lavish Him with praise.
This is the only true love story. It's about a man, fully man and God, that hung over 2000 years ago on a wooden cross being crucified because He loves you so much. He died when you had your back turned toward Him as the enemy of God. He loved you when you did everything against His ways and commands. He loved you when you persecuted Him and His people and declared His truth to be lies, through words and actions. He loved you then and He loves you now. He will never stop loving you.
Maybe it's time to say "I do" to the One who truly loves you. It's a love story that started before you were ever conceived in the womb, and it's a love story that will never end.
Romans 5:8 (NKJV)
But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.
Romans 8:35-39 (NKJV)
Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or peril, or sword? As it is written, 'For your sake we are killed all day long; We are accounted as sheep for the slaughter.' Yet in all these things we are more than conquerors through Him who loved us. For I am persuaded neither death nor life, nor angels nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present nor things to come, nor height nor depth, nor any other created thing, shall be able to separate us from the love of God which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.
John 15:13 (NKJV)
Greater love has no one than this, than to lay down one’s life for his friends.
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